Allergic to cats? Is Fluffy making you sneeze? Well, for a mere $750 to $1,000, you could go to Transgenic Pets and get a cat that has been genetically engineered to be hypoallergenic. “We expect the birth of these first special kittens,” say the cheery scientists, “about two years from now.” Presto: A cute little kitten that does not produce dander.

Of course, it’ll also be a cute little kitten that can MOVE OBJECTS WITH ITS MIND, but whatever.

Update! Collision Detection reader Stoney wrote in to point me to a story at the Sinus News, stating that Transgenic Pets hasn’t been able to find funding for their project. My only question is: There’s a publication called the “Sinus News”?